I just read this post on laughing linked on BoingBoing. And I was gonna let it go, with nothing more than a “Huh. Interesting, but sort of obvious.”
But then I got to thinking how this idea is actually way more important than it seems. Way more important to my own life, especially now, but extending back for years. Because I’ve spent big stretches of the last god knows how long not laughing enough. I’ve been socially constricted to varying degrees; had either no friends or else only two friends who I saw with any degree of regularity; been separated from my larger social support system.
The result of all of this has been extreme. The problem is that when you’re in the middle of the pathology you can miss its consequences. You attribute your decay to other things, because other things are always coming up: some deadline, some conflict with your boss, the uninhabitable wasteland that is Los Angeles.
But when I step back and think about what has been lost in the last ten years, what comes most strongly to mind are the regular episodes of laughing my ass off, laughing-till-my-stomach hurt. Mostly this happened with Peaches and Brett Howe, or else Swanky. Life wasn’t gumdrops and lollipops during those eras; but I was resilient in a way I don’t feel resilient now.
When I first read that article, I made a note in my Google Reader shared items that said something like: ‘So what’s actionable in this knowledge? What are you supposed to do, exactly, knowing this? Schedule time to laugh?’ Which, when I wrote it, seemed absurd. But then I got to thinking, yeah, that’s exactly what you should do. Maybe not in the sense of jotting down “Laugh: 9am – 10am” in your daily planner. But in the sense of scheduling time to be with people who are joyful; doing the things you love; being silly; or whatever. Which is subtly different than just hanging out with friends, which is without a doubt also medicinal, and important. But _this_ kind of interaction, the laughing silly kind, is, I think, the Omega-3 of social interaction. If you don’t get enough you don’t drop dead, but you _do_ fall victim to a host of other troubles.
So I think you’ve got to take it seriously. Sociability is as fundamental to the human animal as exercise; more so, in fact. The quantity of research verifying this idea, from various directions, would take years to read in full. Which means that anybody who pretends not to need people is at best wrong, and at worst either an idiot or a self-deluding fool. The need for friends is written as deeply in nucleotides as the urge to eat or fuck. You can’t survive without them; and ignoring this reality, or giving it short-shrift, is as asinine as eating Taco Bell for every meal. Yeah, you won’t drop dead immediately, but what kind of life is that?
Consider this entry a long note to self. But maybe it will be of use to someone else, too.